Eli's Name

So I wanted to tell you my name story for the little guy. It is a pretty cool story and I think he will love hearing it one day. Three years ago when I was pregnant with Livi  I was driving in my car and I heard this loud God voice say "You will have a son and his name will be Eli" then it repeated again. I was like whoa I never heard a loud God voice before. :) I was determined that we were having a boy named Eli, except that at the time I really didn't want a boy I would have much rather had a girl.  But I was certain because God had told me that it would be a boy. I didn't even think I needed to have an ultrasound to find out. I remember standing at Ella's 1st birthday talking to my friend Melissa and she said "what if it means that you will have a boy SOMEDAY and his name will be Eli?" I hadn't thought about that possibility yet but I thought maybe Melissa was right. Sure enough two days later I found out that I was having a girl.  

The following Sunday I went to church and I was a bit confused about my faith and listening to God. The bible reading at church was a story I had never heard before about Samuel the prophet and Eli. Eli was a high priest, I had no idea Eli was in the bible. I just thought there was Elijah.  So anyways Eli is sleeping and Samuel wakes up and says "Lord did you call me?" Eli says "no go back to sleep I didn't call you" and it happens again and again finally "Eli says next time you hear your name say yes God I am listening because He is calling you". I took this to mean "thank you for being willing to follow me and for listening but I am not calling you yet". So I figured we may have a boy some day.

Fast forward to now being pregnant I had kind of pushed the Eli story out of my head and was picking different boy names. First we picked Luke and Chad's good friend Todd is having a baby named Luke. Then we picked Gabriel, which I LOVED, but found out shortly after that Chad's boss and Confirmation Sponsor is having a baby named Gabriel.  That Sunday I came home and suddenly out of the blue Livi, my two year old,  starts acting out the story of Samuel, Eli and God. It was random! She told me "I'll be Samuel, you be Eli and you be God". I didn't even know she knew that story. I had this overwhelming feeling that God was telling me that he didn't want me to pick Luke or Gabriel but that my child would be Eli. The same night I also got a message from a friend saying that she thought of me today at mass because of the scripture reading. So I went online and looked up what she read and sure enough it was the Eli and Samuel story. I was like whooaa again! I just loved how God used the same child that I thought would be Eli to share with me His plan.

I know it might sound crazy to think that God picked my son's name, but I have a very discerning heart and it feels so good to know that I am following Him and letting Him make choices for me. Anyways I just thought it was pretty cool and thought you guys might want to hear the whole story. 

So his name will be Eli James Copeland. James is after my grandfather who died when I was a baby and Chad's dad's brother who died as a child of heart failure.

I Wanna Live Like That

I have had several questions lately about how to keep up your faith and teach it to the kiddos. Music is probably my number one prayer and the way that I connect most to God. Lately the song "I Wanna Live Like That" by Sidewalk Prophets has struck a cord with me. Listen to the song here so that you understand where I am coming from.


I do want to live like that. I want everyone around me to see God shining through. I want every decision and every step I take to point directly to Him. I think at work and church I do a pretty good job of this. At home it is a bit harder. It seems to be more difficult to share God's love with those closest to us. I think we get a bit complacent and much more easily frustrated with those we love the most.  So my big goal is to show my kids and husband what it means to "Live Like That" everyday!!

So back to the question. How do I keep my faith alive and rocking everyday. Sadly, I have seen so many people who were alive in their faith start to dwindle over time. The world is a dark and scary place and it doesn't give us a lot of time to be great Christians. Instead we are highly distracted by TV, movies, music, books, etc that pull us away from who God created us to be.  Here are a few of the things that I do to keep up the faith and show my kids just how important my relationship with God is to me.

1. Listen to Christian music- I used to be a Texas Country and ghetto rap lover! Yep it is true. My husband and I fell in love because we both loved Pat Green AND believed Tupac was still alive! For the past five years though I mainly stick to Christian music. It fills me with joy and reminds me how much God loves me everyday. It is also the way that I hear God speak to me most often. I feel like He gives me exactly what I need to hear when I need to hear it. Now don't get me wrong I still like to listen to my Texas Country every now and then. It reminds me how much my husband loves me and that is a good thing too! :)

2. Relevant Radio-  I live in Austin and we have the huge blessing of Relevant Radio a Catholic Radio station. I cannot BEGIN to tell you how much I have learned about my faith through this radio station!!!!!  I could argue theology with the best of them just from what Relevant Radio has taught me. This is two fold: one it is a constant reminder of my faith everyday while I am cooking, driving, etc. Two, it is teaching me more and more about my faith. Father Rocky once said "Learn you faith..If you learn it you will love it. If you love it you will never leave it!" I totally agree!!!!

3. Surround yourself with believers- In our church we found a true home for the first time. I wasn't even Catholic when we started attending but was welcomed with open arms. Suddenly we had hundreds of friends who believed just as we did. The closeness of the relationships formed were unlike anything I had every experienced. There is something extremely different about a Christian friendship. It is great to be able to share your faith and ideals with friends!

4. Get Involved!!- Find a ministry at church that you can get involved with. I have been known to be TOO involved, but that is another topic. It could be children's ministry, youth ministry or some type of service ministry. Just make sure it is spiritual and that you will leave feeling full filled. We are all called to serve in different ways. On the music video it shows working with homeless people. That gives me a bit of guilt because I do not do a lot of service ministry. But, I have to remind myself that this okay. My ministry is to witness and I like it that way!

5. Bible Study- The best way to stay involved in your faith is to study God's word!  I find that I am better about this if I have a group of people to study with. I have been involved in several studies over the past few years. One of my favorites was the "The Bible Adventure Timeline" by Jeff Cavens. He teaches you all of the narrative stories of the bible in chronological order. I learned so much from this study!! It changed my way of thinking about the faith. 

But, what keeps me going week to week is my wonderful mommy group! I have a group of women that I meet with each Thursday. We are all moms of young kids. We bring our kids and they run, play and scream while we have the most meaningful, spiritual conversations! It is madness and I love it! These women know me on a level that no one else does. This summer has been hard for us to coordinate our schedules and I can see a difference in my spirituality without them. I have come to need this group!

Any type of group like this is great to join whether it is a bible study at church, mom's group, Life group, couples group just find someone you can share your faith with. I promise it will make a difference!

6. Last but certainly not least Pray, Pray, Pray!- St. Paul said to pray unceasingly. You may think I have no time for that!!! Make it part of your daily life and it is easier to make time. Pray while you wash dishes, take a shower, drive the kids to school, etc. Pray in little moments that make you crazy: when someone cuts you off on the highway, when the kids just won't listen, if your husband does something that makes you cringe, etc. Ask for God's help in all of these little matters. It will make them a lot easier to handle. On the flip side you can say a little "thank you" prayer when good things happen! Just keep the lines of communication open!

All of these little things will add up to a life lived for Christ and your kids will see this!!!!  Then they will start to ask questions and voila the door has been opened to share your faith!!!

Oh Mommy Guilt Go Away!

I think just about every mom first time or otherwise experiences "Mommy Guilt". It seems to begin the second the new baby is born. Although it might begin the moment you get pregnant. Every thought seems to be if I eat this, drink this, do this will it hurt the baby? It doesn't help that my daughters yell "No Mommy don't drink Dr. Pepper you will kill the baby!"
Then after the baby is born it transitions into "is the baby getting enough food?" "I think I am starving her." "Am I holding her too much?" "Am I not holding her enough?" The list goes on and on. I am an avid breast feeding advocate but I think a lot of mom's feel a heaping helping of mommy guilt with breast feeding. Especially when well meaning family members tell you the baby is not getting enough milk.

Mommy guilt doesn't seem to go away as they get older. It just changes a bit. Now my guilt is.... "Are they eating healthy enough?" "Am I teaching them enough about the faith?" "Am I smothering them with the faith?" "Do I give them enough attention and fun activities?" "Am I spoiling them with attention and fun activities?" It feels like every single decision will scar them for life sometimes.

And now we have Pinterest. Oh my Pinterest. Doesn't it make you feel like you are not as cute, fashionable, organized, creative, etc the list goes on. Don't get me wrong I loooovvvee Pinterest but sometimes it can add to our guilt. 

So the point of this post is not to be a total Debbie Downer. Instead, it is to remind us all, that if you are just reading a blog about being a good Christian Mom then you are already full filling your goal to be a great mom. I had a sweet friend ask me the other day how to encourage her three year old in his faith. The only response I could give her is keep up the good work. She clearly has her priorities in the right place and her three year old will grow up knowing how important her faith is to her. Sometimes we get wrapped up in blogs and Pinterest and forget that we are great moms without all of these cutesie ideas and activities. So pick and choose the ideas you like and have time for and forget the rest. :) Remember that each of us will parent in a different way and that God is ultimately in control of everything we do. Be prayerful and thankful for this beautiful life we get to live as Moms and have fun!!!

Teaching Kids to Pray

One  of the most valuable lessons we can teach our kids is how to pray. I believe it is an area we all need extra help with and kind of fall short on teaching. Don't get me wrong we do great job of teaching the "Now I lay Me Down To Sleep" prayers and "pray for Grandma prayers" or Grace before meals, but I mean real connecting with God prayers. One of my main goals as a mom is to teach my kids how to discern God's will in their life. Now if you asked me five years ago to discern something I would have had NO idea what you were talking about. To discern is to prayerfully make decisions based on God's will for your life. Discernment is not easy, in fact it can be very difficult.  Teaching my children to follow God in this way  is a challenge I am ready to take on.  In our culture kids are taught that they can be anything they want to be, go anywhere they want to go, do whatever they want to do, etc.... But I disagree. We can do anything that God wants us to do. If it is in His divine plan for us then we are unstoppable and our job is to follow Him closely enough to understand His plan. As parents we need to teach our children to be the person that God has designed them to be by knowing Him personally and following Him.

I am an extremely discerning person. I believe that God is everywhere in my life and wants to be  part of every decision I make, from the large decisions like "where to work" or "how many kids to have" to the small choices like "what should I wear today?" or "What should we do today?" Now I know that may sound silly, but I truly believe He cares about each of us that much. I also believe that nothing happens out of chance it is all part of God directing our lives. He doesn't typically give us big signs but little nudges here and there. For instance, my God moment from yesterday.....  I really need a nursing cover for the new baby. I wanted to get a good one but I am crazy cheap and could not bring myself to pay $30 for one. I looked several different times at stores and online and just kept chickening out. I felt this icky feeling in the pit of my stomach saying that I shouldn't buy it. The very next day I got an email from a friend with a free coupon for a high quality nursing cover. Coincidence? I don't think so! I think I followed God's will in that little insignificant matter. Yes He cares about the little insignificant things.

So back to teaching our kids. Ella my four year old asks me often "How do I know if God is talking to me?" or "Does God talk to me too?" The answer is yes He absolutely talks to her because some of the things she says are entireley to spiritually profound for a four year old to create on her own.  There are three main ways that God speaks to us and it is typically not a big loud booming voice like on TV.

1. God speaks through scripture- You may read the same bible verse for the 10th time but it will have a diferent meaning for you in that exact moment. This is God using His own words to direct your life. Scripture is our own personal love letter from God! Read it!

2. God speaks through our friends- In any type of serious decision of discernemnt you should always consult a spiritual director or spiritual friend. For some reason we can hear God better when the message is intended for someone else. :) Friends can be a great way to validate a feeling of discernment. It is also helpful to have others pray with you. Does this mean that all advice you get from friends is directly from God? Absolutely not! Consult people you trust and who have a strong faith. Even priests, religious and the Pope have spiritual directors that they discern with.

3. God also speaks through that still small voice in our hearts. It may be an idea that pops into your head or a little whisper in your soul. I think we were trained to believe that we are just that brilliant and all of these ideas are our own. I believe those come from God. Another silly example: I lost a maternity shirt that I only wore once. I needed this shirt because before too long it won't fit anymore. I looked everywhere for it. Then one day I really wanted to wear it and suddenly I saw in my mind's eye that it was at the bottom of a laundry hamper that was full of clothes to be given to Goodwill.  I believe God directed me there. I couldn't have suddenly figured that out on my own. I am not that smart. :)

These are hard concepts for adults to learn and will be difficult for kids too.  I think the way that we can teach these most effectively is by modeling them. Each time we feel God has given us a sign or helped with a a decision just say it out loud so your kids can hear. With the shirt example I might just say "Wow thanks God for showing me where my shirt was". Then Ella might ask "How did he show you?" That gives me a chance to share a bit with her about how I communicate with God. Also point it out if you notice God speaking through your children. If your child says something very profound or loving you can say something like "Wow that was so thoughtful. I think God gave you that idea" or "Wow you must have been listening to God when you said that". It will open up the doors to discuss what it means to listen to Him. In order to effectively discern the large decisions we must first be in tune with God on the small decisions. The more practice that we have the easier it will be to discern His will from our own.

Also, when your child is in the moment and needs discernment, stop with them and pray. Teach them by modeling in your own prayer to ask for God's help. If they are trying to make a decision, lost something special, having an argument with a friend or family member, etc. show them that they can lean on God for support.  Being a teacher in a public school I was never able to share this beautiful gift with my students and it drove me crazy. Can you imagine the climate of a classroom or family if we prayed during our arguments and problems instead of fighting back?

The other important part of discernment is knowing your feelings and how things affect them. When a message or feeling is from God you will feel a sense of peace and calm in your heart. If a message is not from God or is not right in this situation you will feel uneasy, angry, sad, possibly even a bit nauseous.

I am by no means a spiritual director so, if you want more information on Discernment check out St. Ignatius of Loyola. He pretty much wrote the book on the subject. I did a bible study with him a few years ago and it was great. The title of the book that we used was "What's Your Decision?" It is an easy read and explains discernment in a way that anyone can understand. If you are interested  you can buy it here. There are many other St. Ignatius discernment books well that you can choose from.

Happy Discerning!!!

Dad's Corner

So my wife started this blog, and already...I am all over the internet.  I think it is only fair that I introduce myself and my relationship with God.

First of all, I am a proud husband and proud father.  My wife and my family (Mom, Dad, in-laws, sister, etc.) have been pivotal in introducing and guiding me towards a faith-filled life.  Wives...this is the point at which you should be reading and say to yourself..."how did she get him to write a post?"  Well it was easy.  She started this blog two days ago and already has 250+  views.  Now, this tells me that there is an audience out there that is yearning for some evangelizing.  Ok, lets not scare people with that verb.  How about this...there are people out there interested in Christ...furthermore, interested in good ole' Catholic/Christian traditions that may help them with guiding their children.

So why would I write a post?  Well, here is a little bit about me.  I am that type of person that works hard...often physical labor outdoors in Texas (oh the heat!).  I don't believe in going to the doctor until you just can't stand the pain anymore.  I think that you can most times judge someone within the first twenty seconds of meeting them based on how they introduce themselves and how respectful they comply with your introduction.  I think that men should open doors for women and that for the most part...parents these days have become complacent or bored with the idea of raising our children to be respectful.  I have to credit my mom and dad.  Wow what a job!  The respect of others and self they taught me is a lost art (not one that cannot be achieved).  Why go into this???

Because I do not fit the mold of a father or man that should be sensitive to express the importance, or endorse for that matter, the significance of raising your children in a good Catholic environment.  By first sight, I probably would not meet your standards as a "God loving man."  I am pretty rough around the edges.

What I would hope to achieve from this post is this.  MOMS...we husbands, whether we tell you or not, want to embrace your spiritual leadership.  Yes, I am very aware of scripture (forgive my misquoting/paraphrasing)...the man is the spiritual leader.  As this may be true,  we do also like to follow!  Especially when it comes to the "oh so" uncomfortable topics of the Church's teaching.  Just my two cents.  Moms, remember, sometimes we fathers too want to be involved in the spiritual upbringing of our children...sometimes we just don't know how we fit in; what we are comfortable with (i.e. open prayer, praying together, etc.)  I hope and pray for all you mothers out there.  Do not lose sight...as you lead, spiritually, your husbands will follow...and you will be able to share in RAISING OUR (your) CATHOLIC KIDS.