Last year I had the privilege of hearing Chris Stefanik speak at God Stock a youth event in Austin. He was fabulous, the perfect mix of hilarity and spirituality. The topic of his talk was "Un-freaked-outed-ness" I hope you can read that long made up word. He talked about the vast technology in our world and how we get so used to it that it doesn't freak us out anymore. Take your microwave for instance, there are little invisible micro waves bouncing around in there and COOKING your food in a matter of seconds. This is crazy "Back to The Future" type technology. Instead of standing there oohing and ahhing every time our microwave makes us something yummy. We stand their watching the clock and moaning because it won't cook fast enough. Really? 30 seconds isn't fast enough. This is un-freaked-outed-ness. We experience un-freaked-outed-ness with all sorts of technology in our lives.
I was incredibly blessed last week. I gave birth to the first little Copeland grandson! In my family this is a huge deal. My husband and father in law have been waiting for a little guy to take hunting, fishing and teach to work with his hands. Now this was my third child so you would think that this would all be pretty natural to me. It was easier to care for the little guy and we understood the way the hospital worked, but there was NO unfreaked-outed-ness! I can't seem to put into words that feeling during labor when I first heard the cry of the sweet little child that I had been carrying around for 9 months. Or the look on my husband's face when he saw his first born son and all of his dreams as a parent came true. Then the doctor throws that messy little baby on my stomach and the tears just start pouring. Suddenly I am holding a little messy miracle. Then he turns to look at me because he hears my voice. I am constantly amazed by child birth and how God has beautifully orchistrated every aspect of a newborn baby. I was full of freaked-outed-ness!!
Then we changed his little diaper and oh my boys are hard to change!!! Along came a lot more freaked-outed-ness!!! There truly is something different about little boys and I am madly in love with this little guy already. I never want to lose my freaked-outed-ness!
In our faith and relationships we often experience unfreaked-outed-ness. We go through the motions at church or in prayer. We forget the amazing miracles that are taking place all around us especially during Mass. Yes, a microwave and iPhone are pretty amazing, but how much more amazing is Christ truly present with us in Mass? When I get caught up in trying to keep the kiddos quiet during Mass and forget to show Awe and Reverence I pray for freaked-outed-ness. God please show me the miracles of your love and true presence.
We also experience this is in our family relationships. We forget how truly amazing our children and husbands are. Our children are little sponges learning and changing each day. If our husbands weren't so amazing then we never would have married them right? God has given us such beautiful families I pray that we can all be amazed by the little moments with them each day. So.... Let's get freaked out people!!!!
So
I wanted to tell you my name story for the little guy. It is a pretty
cool story and I think he will love hearing it one day. Three years ago
when I was pregnant with Livi I was driving in my car and I heard
this loud God voice say "You will have a son and his name will be Eli"
then it repeated again. I was like whoa I never heard a loud God voice
before. :) I was determined that we were having a boy named Eli, except
that at the time I really didn't want a boy I would have much rather had
a girl. But I was certain because God had told me that it would be a
boy. I didn't even think I needed to have an ultrasound to find out. I
remember standing at Ella's 1st birthday talking to my friend Melissa and she said
"what if it means that you will have a boy SOMEDAY and his name will be
Eli?" I hadn't thought about that possibility yet but I thought maybe
Melissa was right. Sure enough two days later I found out that I was having a
girl.
The following Sunday I went to church and I was a bit confused
about my faith and listening to God. The bible reading at church was a
story I had never heard before about Samuel the prophet and Eli. Eli was
a high priest, I had no idea Eli was in the bible. I just thought there
was Elijah. So anyways Eli is sleeping and Samuel wakes up and says
"Lord did you call me?" Eli says "no go back to sleep I didn't call you"
and it happens again and again finally "Eli says next time you hear
your name say yes God I am listening because He is calling you". I took
this to mean "thank you for being willing to follow me and for listening
but I am not calling you yet". So I figured we may have a boy some day.
Fast
forward to now being pregnant I had kind of pushed the Eli story out of
my head and was picking different boy names. First we picked Luke and
Chad's good friend Todd is having a baby named Luke. Then we picked
Gabriel, which I LOVED, but found out shortly after that Chad's boss and
Confirmation Sponsor is having a baby named Gabriel. That Sunday I came home and suddenly out of the blue
Livi, my two year old, starts acting out the story of Samuel, Eli and God. It was random!
She told me "I'll be Samuel, you be Eli and you be God". I didn't even
know she knew that story. I had this overwhelming feeling that God was
telling me that he didn't want me to pick Luke or Gabriel but that my
child would be Eli. The same night I also got a message from a friend
saying that she thought of me today at mass because of the scripture
reading. So I went online and looked up what she read and sure enough it
was the Eli and Samuel story. I was like whooaa again! I just loved how God used the same child that I thought would be Eli to share with me His plan.
I
know it might sound crazy to think that God picked my son's name, but I
have a very discerning heart and it feels so good to know that I am
following Him and letting Him make choices for me. Anyways I just
thought it was pretty cool and thought you guys might want to hear the
whole story.
So
his name will be Eli James Copeland. James is after my grandfather who
died when I was a baby and Chad's dad's brother who died as a child of
heart failure.
As I have said before I am very pregnant and anxiously awaiting the arrival of my new little man Eli. I don't do very well with the waiting part. For some reason my body does not go into labor on its own so I have a lot of experience in this department. I have six great friends from High School and College who were all pregnant with me and due this summer. They have ALL had their babies now except for me. :) So I am next right?
When I am this pregnant and am feeling all of the pregnancy symptoms, fears, anxieties, etc. I always think about Mary. I think about the fear and anguish she must have gone through. Here she was just a sweet little 14 year old girl working for her parents. Then, she was visited by an angel and told that she would not only become pregnant without being married, but her son would be the King, the Messiah, the man her family had been waiting on for generations. Mary was a good little Jewish girl and she knew exactly what the scriptures foretold about the Messiah. Can you imagine the weight she must have felt? She could have said no. She could have run away from God's plan for her life, but she didn't. She said "Lord Let it be done unto my according to thy will." She openly said "yes" to God knowing that it would make her life difficult and challenging. I guess she knew that being the mother of the son of God would be well worth the pain and fear.
The part of this story that really comes to mind right now is the actual birth of Jesus. I am REAL pregnant. As my husband said yesterday "You remind me of the B 52s." I thought "this outfit doesn't look like anything they would wear" then he started singing "I got me a Chrysler it's a big as a whale!" Thanks friend love you too! So I am as big as a whale. When Mary was this pregnant she and Joseph made the long trek back to Bethlehem for the census on the BACK OF A DONKEY! Can you imagine? Your husbands says, "yeah I know you are real pregnant but I need you to ride on a donkey for a few days". Ummm no thanks! But again she willingly said "yes" and followed her husband. I think about all of the fear of the unknown you have right before giving birth. "Will I be a good Mom?", "Do I have every tiny little baby contraption to make this baby happy?" "Will the baby ever sleep again?", etc. Her fears would have been different though. "Will my baby be safe in this world?" after all he was nearly murdered right after being born by King Herrod. "Will I know how to care for the Son of God?", "Will my friends and family accept this pregnancy?", "How will my little man change the world?" I figure these thoughts must have been swirling in her head as she rode along on that donkey.
Then she goes into labor, not in a hospital, not even in a barn like we are used to seeing. She most likely gave birth to Jesus in the side of a cave. In Bethlehem caves were used as stables for animals. She was surrounded by animals and animal feces. It wasn't sterile, she didn't have her parents waiting in the next room to hug their new grand-baby, she didn't even have a doctor. All she had was her faithful husband and her in faith in God.
I believe we have so much to learn from Mary in this story. She led her life with Grace and love for God. Every decision she made was not for her own glory but for the glory of God. She loved Him and would follow Him wherever he leads. I pray that I can do the same. I pray that I can say "yes" to God with no limitations just as Mary did.
This is my first experience with a little boy. I just keep thinking what if I knew he was destined to change the world. How would I parent differently? I actually had an extremely spiritual and sweet family friend tell my mother-in-law that her grandson would be a priest one day. Father Eli sounds pretty good doesn't it? That would be the ultimate dream of my life to know that I raised a man of God. Even if Eli is not called to be a priest I still want to look back and say that I raised a man of God. I can't wait to meet you tomorrow little Eli!
As a teacher I was always trying to teach my students ethical and moral practices that they may not receive anywhere else. It was so amazing to me to see six and seven year olds treat each other with more love, kindness and empathy than most adults I know. It all stemmed from the Discipline without Stress, Punishments or Rewards system that we used. I blogged about the parenting version of this if you want to read more about it click HERE. There were many values that I taught my kids empathy, patience, understanding, optimism, flexibility, etc. A value that I think all kids (and adults too) should learn is forgiveness.
I started thinking about this blog after listening to Tenth Avenue North's song "Losing". The lyrics explain a hurtful situation and needing God's help in forgiveness. Click on the right to listen to the song.
Yeah we don't like to talk about forgiveness. Forgiving others who have wronged us is hhhaarrrrddd. Let's face it most of us have been hurt pretty seriously at some point in our lives. If you have ever heard my whole conversion story then you know I had to do a lot of forgiving myself. We are taught in this culture that if you are a forgiving person then you are a push over. We have to defend ourselves and stand up for what we believe in or people will walk all over us. So we end up being a culture of people who cannot trust one another. We need to teach children that people make mistakes and before we get angry to put ourselves in their shoes. Many kids do not know how to look at someone else's perspective on a matter. They believe that the wrong doing was intentional and hurtful, when in fact it was usually accidental. As adults we do the same thing, especially to those we love the most.
Granted there are times when people are intentionally hurtful and mean. What do we do in this situation? We are still called to forgive. When asked how many times to forgive someone Jesus said seven times seventy-seven times wholy moly that is 539 times!!! Can you imagine forgiving someone that many times and remaining friends with them? Jesus did! He has forgiven us as many times in our own lives and he keeps hanging around every time we make another mistake. He doesn't just pack up and walk away each time we screw up. Now I don't think it is a good idea to put up with that kind of abuse from someone, but it does show how important forgiveness is to Jesus.
In the Lord's Prayer or "Our Father" we say "Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespassed against us" What does that mean? It means God forgive me just as I forgive others. Sooooo what happens if we don't forgive others? Yikes!! Does this mean that God gives up on us and won't forgive us? No. It means that it makes it hard for us to accept the Grace and forgiveness from God. When we are holding onto pain and anger we can't fully accept God's Grace. We cause ourselves added pain and anguish. So what is the best way to start forgiving someone who has wronged you? It is not something you can do on your own. The only way to truly forgive someone is through the Grace of God. So go to confession. Yep I am back on the confession bandwagon. :) For me reconciliation is always the answer for any problem in our lives. Give it to God through confession and you will be freed from that pain and anguish.This doesn't mean you have to agree with what they did or go through that again. It just means that you have to let go of the anger and pain. Another way to change your heart is to pray for the person who has hurt you. This is a great skill to teach kids. If someone is bothering you pray for them. It helps us to see them as people who make mistakes and need God's Grace just like we do.
We were not taught these kind of things as kids so many of us have dealt with pain for a long time. That is why it is our job to teach our kids how to forgive before someone hurts them. If you practice with the little things then it makes the larger things easier to handle. In a classroom or family situation most things that happen are little and insignificant. We need to teach kids to forgive others and also to ask for forgiveness when they have wronged others. Asking for forgiveness is equally as difficult as giving others forgiveness.
The answer is we don't have to we GET to!
We actually call the Sacrament of Reconciliation a celebration. We get to rejoin ourselves with Christ and His love and Grace every time our sins are washed away. So what comes to mind when you think of confession? A dark, scary, wooden confessional with a condemning priest on the other side of a screen that slams closed on the person confessing? That is what we see in the movies. This could not be further from the truth. What do we actually see when we walk into confession? Two chairs and a smiling priest who is so glad that you chose to come and be reunited with Christ today. Most of the time we do not go behind a screen in fact I never have before. If I did, then I would miss out on the beautiful look of love and compassion in the priests eyes as I share my most difficult stumbles in life. We still have that option available for people who prefer to remain anonymous but I constantly urge people to go face to face. I have seen confession take place in an empty room, near a river and even in a teepee once at a teen retreat. :) It can take place anywhere as long as the priest is open and willing to hear your confession.
So why confess? We all know that Jesus is loving and forgiving. There is no sin that He will not forgive, if we come to Him with an honest heart and ask for forgiveness. But how often do you forgive yourself? Is there something from your past that resurfaces periodically and leaves a horrible guilty feeling in the pit of your stomach? We have a much more difficult time forgiving ourselves then Christ does. He WANTS to forgive us. He wants that pain and guilt to vanish forever. I know before going to reconciliation for the first time I would ask for forgiveness to God in prayer over and over for the same sin, but I could never forgive myself.
During the Sacrament of Reconciliation Christ washes away all of our sin and pain. This leaves our heart open to receive the Grace and Love of God. Sin is very binding and clouds our relationship with God. It is nearly impossible to hear His soft voice and follow Him when wrapped in sin. For this reason nearly every retreat I have ever been to begins with reconciliation. Afterwards we are wide open to recieve God's grace for the rest of the retreat.
This is one of my favorite parts of each retreat. I love to share my views on reconciliation with teens, adults and children. The teens are always so scared their first time. Many of them have not gone to reconciliation since they were in second grade. They walk in apprehensive and nervous. They come out so full of life that they are practically floating with joy and grace. It is obvious the trasnformation that takes place in the confessional. At our Confirmation retreat last weekend I witnessed a 15 year-old boy walk out of the confessional and yell "That was amazing! God MUST be real!" After that first real experience many teens become reconciliatoin advocates. They actually begin to look forward to confession. When the time comes they run to the front of the line to be first. It just makes my day!
We need to teach our teens and young children about this celebration! We need to show them that it is not scary or condemning in anyway. It is quite the opposite!! I had so much fun teaching second grade this year because I had three little sweet Catholic girls in my class. They had their first reconciliation and Eucharist this year. I was able to share my faith with them in the corner of the playground. It was our own little top secret bible study. :) They were all so scared by the thought of confession. I explained to them how wonderful it is. Then they could not wait for it to be their first reconciliation day! They all came back so happy and wanted to go again.
St. Faustina was a Catholic Nun who was visited by Christ over a three year period. Her mission was to share with the world God's unending Mercy and Love. Her diary chronicles these visits, and oh my, is it spiritual! In one of her visits Christ speaks to her about reconciliation. These are His words:
"When you go to
confession, know this, that I myself am waiting for you in the confessional; I
am only hidden by the priest, but I myself act in your soul. Here the misery of the soul meets the
God of Mercy. Tell souls that from
this fount of mercy souls draw graces solely with the vessel of trust. If their trust is great there is no
limit to my generosity"
I love the idea of Christ waiting for us, but we just can't see Him. I picture Him with a beautiful smile on His face and full of love and kindness as we reunite ourselves to Him.
So what is our goal as parents? Go to confession often the more you go the better you will feel! Matthew Kelly in his book "Rediscover Catholicisim" relates confession to a car wash analogy. Think about when you first have your car washed and detailed. It smells so pretty and everything is clean. Your car may have looked like a homelss person was living out of it last week but not anymore! Now it is perfect and clean. So then your son leaves his shoes in the back. You say "nope we are keeping this car clean take them in the house". Next your daughter leaves a doll in the car and you instruct her too to keep your beautiful car clean. You are not letting this car look like a homeless person lived here again! After that you accidentally leave a Target bag in the back, then a Sonic cup, then your kids each leave an item or two. By next week you have forgotten that you were trying to keep the car clean at all. Before long it is full of strange items again.
The same is true with reconciliation when we first walk out of the confessional we are squeaky clean and ready to take on the world! I am not letting sin get in my life, no sir! Then I might say something I don't mean, have a negative thought here or there. Then before you know it sin has crept back into our lives. That is why we must go often especially if you are struggling with something. If I have a problem the first thing I do is take it to God in reconciliation. That is the way to tackle those big problems.
We also need to be open about confession with our kids. That doesn't mean you have to tell them WHAT you confessed just let them know that you go often because you choose to. Let them see how it effects your faith. Encourage them with love to go often as well. Please don't force them, that will only create resentment.
This is my view of reconciliation coming from a previous Protestant prospective. I hope it helps you to reconcile with God soon and often! Happy Confessing!!!
My last post was how to keep our own faith live rocking as parents. After all you can't give what you don't have and our kiddos need us to share our faith with them. Today let's talk about how to keep kids active in their faith as well. What are some ways we can encourage them to have fun learning and living their faith?
This is definetely not the complete list but over the next couple of days I will share a few things that I do in my house:
The first is TV: Yes TV has become portrayed as the evil monster that will consume our children. Is this true? I think it can be, depending on what their little eyes are watching. They not only listen to what they hear but begin to include it in their daily vocabulary and interactions with others.
When we moved into our house 4 years ago an amazing thing happened. I used to be the biggest DVR junky ever! Especially after having my first child and being a stay at home mom. I was DVRing 20-30 shows per week and watching them. When we moved their was a big cable TV controversy in our town and the cable company said it would take them nearly 6 weeks to connect our cable. For a moment I thought I might die! What do you mean I have to live without cable for 6 whole weeks? I am pregnant how will I survive? It turns out I DID survive and we realized that we didn't really need cable anymore. So we called the cable company and canceled. It felt a bit liberating. I was no longer slave to "Grey's Anatomy" and all of the other shows that I felt compelled to watch weekly. It gave me a lot more time to read, pray and spend time with my kids. I feel this decision has changed my family! The only thing I miss these days is a bit of College football but we all make sacrifices right?
In our house the only children's programming that we have is PBS, which is full of good quality education. I am pretty sure Ella is reading at four years old because of "Word World" and "Super Why" and not from my fancy teaching skills. :) They have also learned so much about science, animals and nature thanks to "Sid the Science Kid".
The best thing is our house is not filled with garbage all of the time! I don't have to worry about the characters treating their parents with attitude or fawning over some rock star. All of the characters have good moral values. We are not able to watch children's programming 24 hours per day and there are NO toy commercials!! Did you know young children are the number one advertising marketing group in America? Sell it to the kids and the parents HAVE to buy it. My kids have no idea what cool toys are these days and I like it that way!!
Ella did ask me a question recently. "She said I know PBS has good shows for kids but how come they never tell anybody about God or Jesus?" I didn't really have an answer for this question. It is hard to explain to a four-year-old that not everyone believes in God and that some people are actually offended by him. So that brings me to our other show that is full of good Christian education and values. The other show that my kids watch a lot of is "Veggie Tales"! If you haven't seen it you are really missing out!!!!! The characters are all witty, talking vegetables, that teach bible stories and other moral issues. They cover a lot of the old testament stories. I have to admit that when I first starting learning about the bible I learned it all from Veggie Tales. I would read the stories and picture Larry the Cucumber hopping around in my mind. They sing songs and tell the stories in ways that the kids can understand. There is also just the right amount of adult intelligent humor that is NEVER inappropriate like other children's shows. Kids love it! Parents love it! We are all learning and becoming better Christians. What is not to love? So you are probably wondering, "What channel does Veggie Tales come on?" The sad answer is it doesn't. NBC was airing it on Saturday morning cartoons for a short period but it was canceled. I buy them from Family Christian for $5 or check them out for free at the library.
Often times I sit in church with this overwhelming sense of love and Grace and think "How did I get here? Why on earth did God choose me?" The truth is I have not always had a life of faith. In fact if you are a Facebook friend from high school reading my blog you are probably wondering "What happened to this girl? This is not the girl I went to high school with." So I figured I should tell you how I got here and why my faith is so important to me. I will try and give you the abridged version without all the gory details. :) When I share this with teenagers I give them everything. I figure they need to know that others have had similar difficulties in life and still make it through.
I was not really raised with a strong faith. My family attended the Methodist church but I did not really know God or my faith. In high school my family fell apart and I did my best to keep my head above water. I made a lot of bad choices but survived. In college I guess I was your typical college student but did not know how to truly live life to it's fullest. I made a lot more mistakes along the way, but met my sweet Chad there. Chad was Catholic so we went to Catholic church together. I never in a million years thought I would become Catholic. We had been married a few years and I was very focused on clothing, partying, and trying to still live the college life style. Then my sweet friend Brooke started going to a church and fell in love with God. I noticed such a sharp change in her. She seemed so happy and I wanted what she had. I had no idea how to find faith like that and I was almost certain that the Catholic church was NOT where I would find it. I told Chad that I wanted to go to church more and tried to veer off into a bible church. This scared him a lot. I went to church with Brooke the opening weekend of her then fiance's new church Life in Deep Ellum. The holy spirit was so alive in that place it blew me away. I watched Brooke and Tanner who weren't even married yet praying over another young couple who needed their prayers. I had never prayed out loud in my life, much less prayed over someone before. It lit a fire in me that day. I knew I was going to find my faith one way or another even if that meant leaving the church and going by myself. I started asking Chad all sorts of questions about that hte Catholic church, most of them were pointed and painful. He didn't know the answers to my questions because he did not know much about his faith either. He started to learn more and realized just how beautiful the traditions and sacraments of the church are.
As a last ditch effort Chad signed up for a men's retreat at St. Thomas More called CRHP Christ Renews His Parish. He asked me to attend as well during the women's retreat. I really did not want to go but thought I would try it for Chad. The weekend that Chad was gone I was bitter and angry that he was gone all weekend. When he walked in the door I saw a change in him that I have never seen before. He could not tell me what happened during that weekend but it was clear that he was a new man. I went to CRHP two weeks later. It was the best thing that ever happend to me! I put it right up there with having my children and marrying Chad. If it weren't for this retreat where would I be now? It showed me the beauty and love of the God through the Catholic Church and jump started my faith journey. I left that weekend deteremined to have a relationship with God. I had NO IDEA how to do that. I would listen to the Jars of Clay song "Love Song for a Savior" and the verse that repeats "I want to fall in love with You". It became my mantra. I wanted to fall in love with Jesus but didn't know how. I realized that I didn't NEED to know how I just needed to be open to Him. He did all the rest. My life changed so quickly! I had a new born baby and was suddenly part of a Christian community for the first time in my life. We basically LIVED at the church for a while. I started the RCIA program and became Catholic that year at the Easter Vigil. My faith continued to explode and grow in ways that I would have never thought possible. I am still constantly amazed by how beautiful this church is and how much God loves me. Why me? What did I do to deserve His love? The answer is nothing! There is nothing I could do to earn His love. He is just as happy to love me as I am to love Him. Sometimes I feel like the ultimate prodigal son with God smiling ear to ear. I am so thankful for the last five years of my life!
So from here on out I am different! I am not who I was.
I have had several questions lately about how to keep up your faith and teach it to the kiddos. Music is probably my number one prayer and the way that I connect most to God. Lately the song "I Wanna Live Like That" by Sidewalk Prophets has struck a cord with me. Listen to the song here so that you understand where I am coming from.
I do want to live like that. I want everyone around me to see God shining through. I want every decision and every step I take to point directly to Him. I think at work and church I do a pretty good job of this. At home it is a bit harder. It seems to be more difficult to share God's love with those closest to us. I think we get a bit complacent and much more easily frustrated with those we love the most. So my big goal is to show my kids and husband what it means to "Live Like That" everyday!!
So back to the question. How do I keep my faith alive and rocking everyday. Sadly, I have seen so many people who were alive in their faith start to dwindle over time. The world is a dark and scary place and it doesn't give us a lot of time to be great Christians. Instead we are highly distracted by TV, movies, music, books, etc that pull us away from who God created us to be. Here are a few of the things that I do to keep up the faith and show my kids just how important my relationship with God is to me.
1. Listen to Christian music- I used to be a Texas Country and ghetto rap lover! Yep it is true. My husband and I fell in love because we both loved Pat Green AND believed Tupac was still alive! For the past five years though I mainly stick to Christian music. It fills me with joy and reminds me how much God loves me everyday. It is also the way that I hear God speak to me most often. I feel like He gives me exactly what I need to hear when I need to hear it. Now don't get me wrong I still like to listen to my Texas Country every now and then. It reminds me how much my husband loves me and that is a good thing too! :)
2. Relevant Radio- I live in Austin and we have the huge blessing of Relevant Radio a Catholic Radio station. I cannot BEGIN to tell you how much I have learned about my faith through this radio station!!!!! I could argue theology with the best of them just from what Relevant Radio has taught me. This is two fold: one it is a constant reminder of my faith everyday while I am cooking, driving, etc. Two, it is teaching me more and more about my faith. Father Rocky once said "Learn you faith..If you learn it you will love it. If you love it you will never leave it!" I totally agree!!!!
3. Surround yourself with believers- In our church we found a true home for the first time. I wasn't even Catholic when we started attending but was welcomed with open arms. Suddenly we had hundreds of friends who believed just as we did. The closeness of the relationships formed were unlike anything I had every experienced. There is something extremely different about a Christian friendship. It is great to be able to share your faith and ideals with friends!
4. Get Involved!!- Find a ministry at church that you can get involved with. I have been known to be TOO involved, but that is another topic. It could be children's ministry, youth ministry or some type of service ministry. Just make sure it is spiritual and that you will leave feeling full filled. We are all called to serve in different ways. On the music video it shows working with homeless people. That gives me a bit of guilt because I do not do a lot of service ministry. But, I have to remind myself that this okay. My ministry is to witness and I like it that way!
5. Bible Study- The best way to stay involved in your faith is to study God's word! I find that I am better about this if I have a group of people to study with. I have been involved in several studies over the past few years. One of my favorites was the "The Bible Adventure Timeline" by Jeff Cavens. He teaches you all of the narrative stories of the bible in chronological order. I learned so much from this study!! It changed my way of thinking about the faith.
But, what keeps me going week to week is my wonderful mommy group! I have a group of women that I meet with each Thursday. We are all moms of young kids. We bring our kids and they run, play and scream while we have the most meaningful, spiritual conversations! It is madness and I love it! These women know me on a level that no one else does. This summer has been hard for us to coordinate our schedules and I can see a difference in my spirituality without them. I have come to need this group!
Any type of group like this is great to join whether it is a bible study at church, mom's group, Life group, couples group just find someone you can share your faith with. I promise it will make a difference!
6. Last but certainly not least Pray, Pray, Pray!- St. Paul said to pray unceasingly. You may think I have no time for that!!! Make it part of your daily life and it is easier to make time. Pray while you wash dishes, take a shower, drive the kids to school, etc. Pray in little moments that make you crazy: when someone cuts you off on the highway, when the kids just won't listen, if your husband does something that makes you cringe, etc. Ask for God's help in all of these little matters. It will make them a lot easier to handle. On the flip side you can say a little "thank you" prayer when good things happen! Just keep the lines of communication open!
All of these little things will add up to a life lived for Christ and your kids will see this!!!! Then they will start to ask questions and voila the door has been opened to share your faith!!!
I think just about every mom first time or otherwise experiences "Mommy Guilt". It seems to begin the second the new baby is born. Although it might begin the moment you get pregnant. Every thought seems to be if I eat this, drink this, do this will it hurt the baby? It doesn't help that my daughters yell "No Mommy don't drink Dr. Pepper you will kill the baby!"
Then after the baby is born it transitions into "is the baby getting enough food?" "I think I am starving her." "Am I holding her too much?" "Am I not holding her enough?" The list goes on and on. I am an avid breast feeding advocate but I think a lot of mom's feel a heaping helping of mommy guilt with breast feeding. Especially when well meaning family members tell you the baby is not getting enough milk.
Mommy guilt doesn't seem to go away as they get older. It just changes a bit. Now my guilt is.... "Are they eating healthy enough?" "Am I teaching them enough about the faith?" "Am I smothering them with the faith?" "Do I give them enough attention and fun activities?" "Am I spoiling them with attention and fun activities?" It feels like every single decision will scar them for life sometimes.
And now we have Pinterest. Oh my Pinterest. Doesn't it make you feel like you are not as cute, fashionable, organized, creative, etc the list goes on. Don't get me wrong I loooovvvee Pinterest but sometimes it can add to our guilt.
So the point of this post is not to be a total Debbie Downer. Instead, it is to remind us all, that if you are just reading a blog about being a good Christian Mom then you are already full filling your goal to be a great mom. I had a sweet friend ask me the other day how to encourage her three year old in his faith. The only response I could give her is keep up the good work. She clearly has her priorities in the right place and her three year old will grow up knowing how important her faith is to her. Sometimes we get wrapped up in blogs and Pinterest and forget that we are great moms without all of these cutesie ideas and activities. So pick and choose the ideas you like and have time for and forget the rest. :) Remember that each of us will parent in a different way and that God is ultimately in control of everything we do. Be prayerful and thankful for this beautiful life we get to live as Moms and have fun!!!
